The adoption process can seem overwhelming and confusing and we believe it doesn’t have to be that way. We help support women with step by step guidance through the adoption process.

Since we are both new here let me tell you a little bit about My Adoption Coach, I created this business to help guide women through the adoption process.  After going through a long infertility battle I turned to adoption thinking it would be the faster and easier road to motherhood and boy was I wrong. After a disrupted adoption at 7 days of parenting, several almost matches, and even a couple of failed matches we managed to navigate the system with very little support to find our way to our daughter and son.

After surviving all of this I vowed to not let another woman walk through this journey alone.  To share what I learned to help save her time and heartache. Let’s get started with what you need to know before adopting a child. 

10 Things To Know Before Starting the Adoption Process:

1. How to Adopt a Baby

2. How to Pick an Adoption Agency

3. How Long Does It Take to Adopt A Baby

4. How Hard it is To Adopt a Baby

5. How To Pass An Adoption Home Study

6. How Much It Costs To Adopt a Baby

7. Adoption Laws by State

8. Post Adoption Placement Process

9. How to Complete Adoption Paperwork

10. You are Your Only Advocate

How To Adopt a Baby

Like there are no two identical snowflakes, there are no two identical adoption journeys and thus there is no manual or step by step guide to adopt a newborn baby.  I am a very structured person and was craving someone to tell me exactly how to adopt in great detail and well no one could tell me anything beyond how they do things in their version of the process.  But I learned that the steps to adopt a baby really boiled down to three things: Define Your Journey, Share Your Story, Become a Mother. If you want to learn more about our process you can join my Free Facebook Group where I share tips, step-by-step processes, and answer questions.

How To Pick an Adoption Agency

There are so many options when it comes to adoption agencies or even if you use an agency at all.  The options were mind blowing, this step very difficult for an analytical person.  

Talking to one agency would bring up one question that would make me need to go back and ask the same question to all of the other agencies.  The key was developing a list of questions to ask each agency so I could clearly categorize them in my mind. I swear that list of questions saved us so much time! 

How Long Does It Take To Adopt A Baby

This question may seem obvious on the surface, I mean we all know it takes 9 months for a baby to come to full term, but the average wait time for adopting a child varies greatly depending on what route you go.  We chose to go to the private agency route and it took us 1 year to adopt each of our children, which is way less than the average of 2-3 years as we were warned when we signed up with our agency. There could be a million factors that played into this but our agency believed our wait was shorter because we very clearly told the story of our current and future family. We use a custom framework to help our clients tell their stories, if you would like to learn more you can setup a free consultation call. 

How Hard Is It To Adopt A Baby

Let’s not sugarcoat this at all, adoption can be hard.  While it is the most beautiful thing in the world it comes with many challenges.  The key to making it less difficult on yourself is to have faith that in the end things will work out, which if you are fresh off an infertility journey this statement can want to send you screaming in the opposite direction.  Adopting a child is not easy and it really shouldn’t be easy. I found it difficult because there was no right answer in most cases, it was just a go with you gut type of situation. It can be hard emotionally, financially, spiritually, hard on your relationships, and well the list can go on and on.  But it can be so much easier if you have people to support and guide you through the process.  

How To Pass The Home Study

The home study, imagine some eerie music playing here, it is one of those topics that can scare the living crap out of you when you first start the adoption process.  I mean you are going to invite people into your house to inspect where this child is going to live. They are going to ask all sorts of fun questions about your marriage, your finances,  your job, your discipline strategy and a ton of other questions. The best way to pass your home study is to be honest and thoughtful about everything.  

How Much It Costs To Adopt a Baby

This question is one I get on a daily basis, everyone is curious on how much did my adoption costs. The cost to adopt a baby depends on so many factors.  The type of agency you choose, how restrictive you are on particular topics, time frame, location, etc all influence how much it costs to adopt. If you are struggling to know how to budget for your adoption, discuss it with your adoption coach (not your agency) to help get clarity.

Adoption Laws by State

Since there is little to no federal oversight into the adoption process understanding the laws in each state is important.  The laws can vary dramatically and sometimes agencies may not have a clear understanding so it is important to discuss the requirements with an attorney that specializes in adoption law in that state.  The key questions to ask an adoption attorney: what is the revocation period, what are the eligibility requirements, what are the risks.

Post Adoption Placement Process

Again, this is a topic that varies dramatically between agencies, states, and is even influenced heavily on birth mother request.  The important things to know in the adoption post placement process are: what are your rights, what is the revocation period, where can you go during the revocation period, what is the finalization process, whose insurance is this child on during the revocation period, what important paperwork do you need to care for this child during the revocation period and after. The importance of an experienced coach can not be understated in this section of the process, it will help you save time and hassle! 

How to Complete Adoption Paperwork

The paperwork process is intense and requires an excellent attention to detail. The list of paperwork required to adopt typically includes: tax returns, bank/savings/retirement statements, letters to verify employment, letters from your doctor about your health, proof that the child can go on your health insurance, agreed upon discipline statement, state background checks and federal background checks. The list can seem like it goes on forever but the key to completing your paperwork to be eligible for adoption is just paying attention to exactly what is requested and delivering exactly that. 

You are Your Only Advocate 

The #1 thing to know before adopting a child is that you are your only advocate.  There is no one looking out for you in this process, not even your agency. The best gift you can give to yourself is to clearly paint a picture of what you want your life to be like at the end of this journey and find a coach to partner with to keep you strong on your journey to get to your end vision. 

Adoption is hard and full of ups and downs but having a child is the most rewarding thing I have ever experienced in life. Having a coach in your corner will help you understand the steps in the adoption process and have a sounding board as you make life changing decisions. Having someone in your corner that has walked the same path is critical help you achieve your goal of motherhood. 

I help women build their families through adoption by giving them the step by step guide to adopt a child and support on their journey