3 Tips for the Adoption Waiting Time

Are you trying to adopt a baby and finding yourself stuck in the waiting to be matched phase, really trying to figure out how you can make the best use of that time? I know that was a period of time during which I struggled. I am obsessed with cleaning and organizing things. And honestly, my anxiety level was through the roof. What I wish I had done was prepared to parent and learn more about how to care for a newborn, especially through the adoption phase. And that's the reason why today we're going to have a conversation with Valerie from the New Parents Academy. Valerie is a postpartum doula. And she has some resources that are specific to helping adoptive parents not only bond with their child but also care for their adopted child so that you come home feeling confident and ready to enjoy those snuggle-worthy moments. I'm super excited to have Valerie on the show today.

Amanda: Let's dive into our conversation with Valerie. Valerie, thank you so much for joining us today.

Valerie: Thanks for having me. I'm excited to be here.

Amanda: I would love it if you wouldn't mind starting the conversation by just letting the audience get to know you a little bit more. Can you share a little bit more about you and your background? Sure.

Valerie: My name is Valerie Trumbauer. I am a postpartum doula and a lactation counselor. So what this means is that I spend a lot of time working with families immediately after they bring their babies home. So I've done this for the past 10 years, helping people with that transition of getting used to this new little person who's living in their home and understanding things like how to soothe the baby, how to get good habits in place, and things like that. And so I have done that for many years. And it was about four years ago that I started working with my first family, which was preparing to adopt. And up until that point, I knew very little about adoption, newborn care, newborn prep as it relates to adoption, and things like that. So that was just a really pivotal moment. Because the first family that I worked for was really special, they were preparing to adopt twin boys. I am a mom of three, and I have three teenagers in my house. And when my daughter was three years old, we got the shock of our lives: we were having identical twins. And so when that first family was preparing to adopt twins, I was excited to be a part of that. But then, through that process of helping them get ready, which took just two weeks from the time that we met to the time that the babies were born, I learned so much about what adoption preparation looks like. And there weren't a lot of resources that helped people with adoption-specific information. And so I know we'll talk more about that. But that's kind of a little bit about me and what I do.

Amanda: Well, I'm so excited that you're here, and Valerie and I recently met at a conference that was specifically for adoption attorneys. And as I got to know Valerie as a human, she was just amazing. And I was super excited, not just to meet her but because I think she's a fabulous resource for our community. Because of your point, there are no resources that really talk about how you can prepare for a baby that don't subject us that are waiting to adopt to not having to be in that environment where it's full of pregnant bellies and maybe not quite so comfortable for us, or at least it wasn't for me. And so that's why I'm so excited about this resource for our community because that education comes not only from an adoption-specific lens on how you can prepare to be a parent but also from not having to be in that moment where you're surrounded by pregnant people. Because that's not quite so fun. So thank you for doing this for our community. Yes, we're super excited. Sure.

Valerie: And it's funny because I live in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, so I live about 45 minutes north of Philadelphia. That first family that I worked with had prepared by sitting in a class in a hospital surrounded by pregnant families. And as you know, the journey for so many people towards an option comes through infertility. So for them who were sitting in this, you know, class during the home study process, these other people around them—not only are they three weeks away from having a baby, they're also now sitting in this family—these hopeful adoptive parents are picking out information and going, okay, that might pertain to us. Okay, that would be a little different for us. Oh, that doesn't pertain to us at all. And I think it's, first of all, not a great use of anyone's time besides the emotional pieces of it, which you know you shouldn't have to do. And that didn't seem fair to me. And so that's why I started to create the adoption-specific resources that I did. Because there are things you know, I have videos about, like, how to be a baby. It does not matter how that baby came into your life; that video is for you, regardless of whether you carry that baby in your body or not. But then there are other things—you know, other resources that I have—that we'll talk about in a bit, but like finding a pediatrician, that process is going to look different. If you are adopting, then you're pregnant. And so I think you deserve to have information that speaks to your situation. And so that's what I try to do with all of the content that I create.

Understanding the Baby's Cry: Unlocking the Language of Parenthood

Amanda, which I think is just amazing. Just so you know, thank you again; that's super duper helpful. I know, another thing I was waiting to adopt that I hadn't really considered was my parents. Yeah, it was something that was even on the radar because, quite honestly, you get into the adoption period. And you're kind of in the adoption journey; you get so caught up in, like, the next thing I have to do, and you stay so focused on those things that, if you're carrying a child in your body, you have nine months where you're intentionally preparing, you know, understanding what's happening in your body and what's coming next. And so it could just be a survey of one, but understanding how to parent and that there are things that I functionally need to know to keep this tiny human alive Yes, it wasn't necessarily something that was on my radar. So I know that today you have prepared for the audience some things that they can be doing while they're waiting to be matched to really help themselves get more educated. Do you want to dive into that?

Valerie: Yes, for sure. And I think, to speak to what you were just talking about, when you're carrying a baby in your body, there is there are benchmarks, so it's like, okay, by the time I'm 20 weeks pregnant, I'm gonna have my registry God, by the time I'm, you know, this pregnant, someone told me I should do this. That is, it isn't as natural a sequence when it comes to adoption. And plus for people to let their mind go to that baby side. There's an emotional aspect to that. But there are also, as you said, those checklists, and you're like, I'm in the paperwork, and I'm in the fundraising. And I'm doing all of this. And so what I always say to the hopeful adoptive parents that I work with is, "We get to skip to the good part we're going to talk about: there's going to be a baby in your home, and I want to help you. My goal is that you get that call, and there's not a part of your brain that starts to second guess yourself, right? Because our brain wants to protect us. So as soon as you're like, Okay, wait, I got the call I've been matched with, are we really ready? Do we really know? And you're going to start that doubt. And that is a downward spiral; that's not going to be productive for anyone. When you get that call that you're matched or that the baby's here, there are other things you need to do, like cancel your dentist appointment, board the dog, and do a bunch of other things. I don't want you to spend this time wondering if you're actually prepared for this moment that you've been waiting so long for. So I will dive into number one. And so we're going to talk about three things that you can do while you're waiting. I want to begin by saying, "This isn't really a to-do thing; this is a to-understand thing. And it's to understand the baby's cry. And it's a little bit off from, you know, we're going to talk about a couple of other things I like to do, but I feel like, having done what I do and worked with hopeful adoptive parents for so long, I now understand the importance of talking about this. If you follow me on Instagram or anywhere else, you know I talk about this a lot. You want to understand that the baby's cry is the only way that they can communicate. And so you're like, Okay, I'm watching this video, I'm waiting, or I'm in the home study process. It's really important. Yes, I want you to keep hearing this again because I want to flip the switch on it. You know, if we're sitting here talking and all of a sudden I start bawling my eyes out, you're not going to be like Valerie. Can you give us number two? What was number two on the list? because it's not the way that we communicate? If I were crying, you're going to be like, "Something's wrong? Are you in emotional pain? Are you going through something? You're not just going to go about things as if everything's normal. That is not the case when it comes to life with a newborn; you can. And the way that I explain it to a lot of hopeful adoptive parents is to pick a language that you don't speak. If you don't speak Greek. If you don't speak Portuguese, you can imagine that the baby is just yelling at you in Portuguese. You know, it's like, "Okay," but at first it's like, "Hey, I'm hungry. When that meat goes on, now the baby's getting louder; now the baby's getting more upset. So that is the only way that he can communicate that to you. He's not okay; I'm going to start with this, and then, you know, if I were trying to explain something to you, I'm going to start one way and go another way. That's not it. We have crying, and we have louder crying, and then we have, like, really crying, right? Those are the things that the baby can communicate, and so by understanding this now, what it helps is that you're not going to take that crying personally. This doesn't mean that the baby doesn't trust you; it doesn't mean that, you know, the baby isn't comfortable with you. The baby is not crying because you're not his birth mother; the baby is crying because he has a need that he's trying to communicate to you. And so, you know, that's what the whole point of the crying is. And I think when you can flip the switch to view things that way, it can really do a lot for our self-confidence as new parents. And you know, and then when you're in it and it's happening, it's like, Okay, what's going on here? There are different cues when the baby's crying—is his tummy hard, is he pushing his head back? Is he sucking on his hand? These are all different cues that are going to give us a clue as to what's going on. But really, the takeaway here is to understand that when the baby's crying, I'm not taking that personally; I am going to understand that the baby's communicating with me in his native language, which is crying, and you likely don't speak crying.

Amanda: I love that tip. And I really wish that was something that I knew First off, honestly, the four hospital nurses told us when we showed up to pick up our first child at the hospital, and we were, you know, there for a few days, and I was like, "She's crying, and I just don't know what she needs, and what do we do? And she taught me that she was like, "Well, there's actually a difference. And she said, "Look for the cues, right? And just as you said, you know, it was the push; it was listening to the sound that the cries make. And if it's making this sound, it means this, and if it's making that sound, it means that, and I had no idea. But what I realized is that I was coming at it from a place of inadequacy. I was feeling like, Oh, I'm obviously not giving you what you need. You're rejecting me—you know, those types of things. That's what was happening on a subconscious level within me that was putting up the block of not really understanding. No, I need to understand the native language of crying for this child, look for the cues, and then begin to dissect it. That poor nurse was so sweet to me. She was like, "Let me teach you all the things. I was like, "Great. Give me a crash course. Right? Yeah, I still think about her quite often. Because even to this day, with a five-year-old, sometimes I'm like, Hmm, I see that you actually need this versus that.

Valerie: And I think it's important to recognize that, like, your second child might have been a different type of baby. So you know, you might say, "Well, I have two older kids." Maybe you gave birth to two older kids and two kids previously, then you adopted, and you're like, "Well, this baby is different. It's not that situation; that baby was adopted, or each baby is different. I mean, I have identical twins; they are, by all science, the same person, apparently. But, you know, it's like they cry differently. They have different needs. And so we really need to take that into consideration. and not made for crying about you. The crime isn't about you; you're the detective on the case, which, honestly, is what it comes down to. But the crime isn't about you.

Essential Tips for Adoptive Parents: Building Your Parenting Village and Finding the Right Pediatrician

Amanda: That is really great advice. That was what the nurse said that day; she was like, "It has nothing to do with you or the fact that you're his mother, right? It has everything to do with the fact that this is their language, and you just need to interpret it, react accordingly, and keep trying something until it's the right thing.

Valerie: Yeah, and I always talked about, "It could be this, and we're looking at this cue. And if it's that, you know, I walked through a lot of different things. But then the last thing was like the baby still crying, and it wasn't any of these things. Go outside, look at the birds, or, you know, it's also okay to get frustrated. And you're like, "This is like we're talking about it. Like it's lighthearted. A crying baby that won't stop crying can be really frustrating. And then it's like, "Okay, where's the safe spot that you can put the baby and go get a little time, give yourself a few minutes away, and then go back to that situation? Because it's the baby's native language. And just because it's the only way they communicate doesn't mean that it's not going to be frustrating. So I think recognizing that but also just being like, "Okay, you know, this is nothing about me," is definitely not about you.

Amanda: That's a really great tip. Thank you for sharing that.

Valerie: All right, are we ready for number two? Yeah. Okay. And so for number two, this is something that we touched on at the very beginning, but taking the time to find a pediatrician, like, I want you to walk away with like, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do this finding a pediatrician. Wow. And you're like, really, really, like, we haven't even been matched. For a lot of people waiting to be matched and having babies in hand, this happens pretty quickly. And you deserve to take the time to find a pediatrician. So that it's someone who works well for you and you feel like you can openly communicate with and this is something that looks a little bit different for adopting families than it does For people who are pregnant, it's an important piece of the puzzle here if your baby is never sick in the first year, which is sort of laughable because at some point, you're going to be like, No, we need to go to the pediatrician to see your baby at least about seven times, depending on ICPC. And when you get back home and things like that, this is an important part of your village. And especially if this is your first baby, you're going to have things where you're like, I don't know, is this normal? What's that sound he's making? What's that flake on his head? What's this? You need your village. And so, you know, a good starting point is your sister's pediatrician or your best friend or all that, but people are like, I don't need to." You know, my best friend loves her pediatrician. Okay, that's great. That's a great starting point. But you still want to take the time to either meet with them or talk to them on the phone. And I think when it comes to, you know, adoption, specific information, to have a conversation with them saying, "You know, do you have a lot of patients who have adopted?" and not like, "Oh, he seemed super nice. And then he said he didn't—okay, he's off the list. Not at all, but like, it takes time to educate them. You know, okay, well, I don't, please don't ask me every well check if we have a history of diabetes in the family, or, you know, if my husband or I or my partner have dealt with this or something. It's like, there's going to be things we don't know. That's one thing you want to say; another might be, "Listen, we're in the process of waiting to be matched. And here's what that process looks like as we get calls: We might get called, we said, and we were open to different medical situations. If I got a call about something, would it be okay for me to reach out and talk to you about what that might look like long-term for a child? Who has this condition? You know, then you have that person as a part of your village. And so taking the time now to do that can be really helpful.

Amanda: Yeah, I think you touched on two really important things there that I often share with our audiences. Well, first, the right partner for you can be somebody different. And for somebody else, because your communication styles are different. And so you want to make sure, just as I coach my clients, whenever they're looking to see, like, what agency should I work with our attorney? You need to talk to them and make sure you feel comfortable asking the really uncomfortable questions. Because if you don't, they are not the right partner for you. Because you need someone with whom you can have an open line of communication to ask about, to your point, every weird thing, what is that flick on their head? Or what is the sound that they're making, and not feel weird or overly, you know, reactive, or whatever, to that? The second piece that you really touched on that I think is really important is just doing really kind of that due diligence up front on all the different aspects of what you are equipped to do as a parent. And so, from an equipped superior perspective, you do need someone with whom you can go ask those questions about medically complex situations, right? And so if you're like, what does it mean that she, you know, used marijuana up until this date, or she drank alcohol up until this state, and Google can scare the EverLiving? Crap. He wants to talk to an actual doctor—an actual pediatrician—who sees these things and is willing to be patient and answer the questions. And if you're like, "You know what? I'm cool, I feel like I'm really good there, and I'm open with whatever life throws at me, and you know, good, then maybe that's not something you need. But the point is, in both situations, you want to have someone who's really willing to be a part of your village and help you from that perspective. And as an adoptive mom and pediatrician's office that understands adoption, and for those that don't, there is a big difference because you do get the questions routinely about things like medical history and all of these other things. And from somebody who doesn't understand adoption, they don't understand that some of those details might not be things that you know, and as your children get older, for you to routinely ask those questions can actually make them feel uncomfortable with you as their physician and their provider. So my oldest is to the point now that when somebody asks something like that, she's like, "We don't know. And it's not a big deal. What matters is me, you know, and so on, but she's vocal enough to advocate for herself in those situations. And so I try to be really mindful of making sure that we have a literate physician interacting with her when it comes to adoption, because that's what makes her most comfortable. And that bond of comfortability is really important. If she continues to grow into an adult, especially a young adult, I want her to be comfortable with her doctor to ask those questions that, you know, she may need, and you know, God forbid, I should not be there to be able to help her.

Expert Advice on Baby Gear and Adoption: Essential Tips for Preparing for Your New Arrival

Valerie: Okay, and so on to number three. Right. And I think number three, or I think I know number three, is to consider baby gear. So what I'm talking about here, and I'm bringing this up, is that a lot of people are like, "Well, we don't have our nursery together yet, or we do have our nursery, or I'm registering. And there are a lot of thoughts about this. As far as I'm concerned, I don't want to set up a nursery, but I do want to. And I think that that is a very personal decision; it is not necessary that you are setting up a nursery right now. But I do want to bring it up, because I think what you want to do is have your list of baby gear items that, you know, if we're matched and we're ready to bring the baby home, these are the things that I want to have. And now this is another place where it doesn't look the same as if you were pregnant; you're not going to Amazon and going down that big list that, you know, once the baby is in your home, that's great; then, you know, your girlfriends and your sisters, and everybody's going to have so many recommendations about what worked for them. But right now, you're really wanting to start with the basics. And also, they're not all things that you need to buy now; an example is an infant car seat. That's something that I would read, like, I'm a researcher, so I love, you know, research, and so I might start looking into, okay, what infant car seats do I want? And so, baby, it's called Baby Bargains, which is like one of my favorite baby gear books. In their rating system, like ABCD, they're giving you letter grades for car seats. So I might read through that and be like, Okay, I know that I want this car seat. Okay, so you know that you want it? Is it on Amazon? Where are you going to get it from, and then you just have it, like, with your checklist of, "Okay, we got the call; now you know which one you want, and maybe you're going to have it sent to where the baby is born. And you know, when it comes to other baby gear, it's like, "Okay, I think I'm going to get this, or my friend has offered me this," so you kind of need to just figure out what we want to start collecting or storing. And what do we want to wait on? And what things do we want? You know, I live in Pennsylvania. So the revocation period is 30 days, and so that first family I worked with, who was getting ready to bring home babies at a time where they're waiting, you know, they're not going to know for at least 30 days if this is really permanent. i At that point, I came up with a 30-day must-have list of, "Okay, these are what you need for those first 30 days. And it doesn't have things that you might like; it doesn't have a stroller on it. A stroller is especially a twin stroller, oh my gosh. I sound like a dinosaur when I say, My first car was $600. And, like, it was a twin stroller sometimes. So if you don't during those first 30 days, you're probably going to the pediatrician and back. And so a stroller isn't a necessity. But there are other things that you're going to want to have. And so I think it's important to kind of understand, "Okay, are we going to set up a nursery? If we are, what are we going to put in there? If we're not, what items do we want to get after we've gotten that call that was matched, or after we bring the baby home? And, and I think then, you know, as you start to share more with friends and family that you're preparing to adopt you, you've got your stance on this, so that people are like, Oh my gosh, you definitely need this thing. And it's like, awesome, I have like a notes folder on my phone where I'm putting all of these things, not like, okay, well, we're only buying blah, blah, blah, you know, you just can't know what you're doing as far as baby gear. The other thing is that it's expensive. It is not cheap to buy all of this. So I think I kind of understand. And if you know, I also have a list of things like packing to meet the baby and what you're bringing there, and I think, really, as you're starting to pack and think for that call, it's like, okay, you know, we want to have things like a couple of swaddles, a couple of outfits, a couple of pacifiers, three bottles is always my recommendation, things like that, that you can feel like, okay, we have what we need, but we haven't spent thousands of dollars on things that we're not ready to use yet.

Amanda: Yeah, that is such great advice because you never know where you're going to get a call, right? And you may have weeks, you may have days; maybe it has already been born, and it may be jumping in the car and going, right, but also having lived kind of the other side of adoption that we all, you know, kind of have in the back of our minds. And he experienced a disruption. You may not want to use that gear again. And so that was our situation. We had a disruption, and we had things that were hers. And I didn't want to use it again because I didn't want the memories, nor did I want it in my house or between my houses. And so I wanted to dispose of those things. Of course, I've made sure it went to good homes, either with her or to a nonprofit. A few things, you know, didn't go to my mom's or storage because I just couldn't have them in my house.

Valerie: And that's what people have said—that it's one of those parts of adoption where it's not great to think about, like, Wait, what am I buying? How is this situation different? So, let me be like, "Here, this is what you need. And I have a list, and I think you are going to I can give you the link to the workshop. But I have a free workshop where I give people the 30-day must-have list because this is something that people have told me before, like, Thank you for giving me this list. Thank you for not making me go through an Amazon registry and really consider each item—do I actually need that? It's like, "Nope, right. Here's what you need for the first 30 days: And so I give that to the people there.

Amanda: Yeah, that is phenomenal. Thank you. Yeah, because I definitely believe you shouldn't have your shower until after revocation is over. So going and buying those things that you need to basically make it through revocation, in my opinion, makes the most sense for you to do. Maybe your mom, your mother-in-law, or whatever wants to help you get it. But you know, beyond that, because you will feel obligated to hand the gift back to them hand in hand, do you keep it for the next child, like it gets into this really messy, complicated space? So you're best off just following Valerie's list and really kind of going through that as your guide as to what you want to get for those few items. It's everything you need to care for a baby, and those very first few stages So that's phenomenal. But you mentioned the free training; I would love for you to share a little bit more about that with our audience. Because if they've loved these three tips as much as I have, I know they're going to love your training as well, for sure.

New Parents Academy: Your Go-To Resource for Adoption and Baby Care Tips on Instagram

Valerie: So it's just a free online workshop called "Seven Things Adoptive Parents Learn the First Week Home with a Newborn, and there is a certificate of completion. If you're with an agency or a home study that requires a certificate of completion, it's going to be a totally free one-hour certificate of completion that you get at the end of that workshop, as well as that 30-day list. But what this workshop is going to do is help you get into that frame of mind of, "Okay, there's going to be a newborn here. We talked through crying; you hear me talk through crying, but just talking about things that people aren't familiar with, like, how much is the baby going to eat? You know, we're talking about what when it comes to newborn sleep? What can you expect? The way that I explain it in that workshop is that I want you to imagine that you've been matched, you've been called to the hospital, and now you're sitting down at discharge with the nurse. And when the nurse is talking to you, she's going to tell you, Okay, this is what happened; this is how much the baby ate last time; this is how much you can expect the baby to eat in the next debate." She's going to start rattling things off. I don't want that to be the first time that you hear those things. And I don't want you to sit there and be like, Wait, what's that? Why is she saying that? You know, and because it's that downward spiral that we've talked about. You sit there going, "Oh my gosh, I am not equipped for this. I thought I was ready. I don't want that to happen. So I want you to be sitting in there going, Oh, I remember Valerie talking about that. You know, in that workshop, Amanda poured so much into us that I think you'll come away just being like, "Okay, even if you've had kids before, if you have older kids, even if your sister had a baby, and you were right there along the way, it's really going to be something that, you know, people are like, I've had three kids. And I forgot about these things. Because we're talking about that first week, no matter how much you prepare, that first week is going to be a blur. So of the things that I tell you, what are the things that people very often forget?

Amanda: That is awesome. Yes. Because when you spend all this time again preparing to get to this stage, when you get there, honestly, you want to transition into this blissful moment that you have in your head, right? Because I often encourage people as they're waiting to really stay focused on the end goal, like, what is the end goal? Is there this moment for you that you see so clearly in your future? For me, it was us playing ball in our backyard with our dogs, right? I wanted the kid swinging and playing ball with the dogs; I could see that, and that was my concrete moment. But when you're sitting there, you know, after discharge, the station is really getting ready to leave. And all that fear and insecurity starts to creep in. That picture gets really blurry, right? So we want to make sure you feel really equipped so that that picture stays crisp and you see what you're working towards. And knowing that you're just on the next step of that journey to that next thing that you have in your mind.

Valerie: Yes, and preparing ahead of time It's like when you go on vacation and have everything planned out. You're like, Oh, I know where we're eating tomorrow night," or "You know, I know what we're doing. You're not in the moment; you're not at the museum, being like, two miles from here is an Indian restaurant, but it gets five stars because you know what you're doing and you feel more organized. And the same is true of those sweet moments and those first couple of weeks, which are only going to happen once and when you can be present. And you can think more about how I am going to bond with the baby. That's something I talked about in the workshop: how to bond from day one. If you're like, "What can I do now to be, you know, bonding and things like that?" then you're not sitting there Googling, like, I don't know she's doing this; is that normal? Like, it's something horribly wrong, but you kind of can breathe and just enjoy those sweet moments.

Amanda: Yeah, and enjoying the sweet moments is what it's all about. For sure. Wow, this has been a very sweet moment with you. Thank you, Valerie, so much. I would just love to close out our conversation by asking if there's anything else you'd like to share with the audience and where they can find you.

Valerie: Sure, I think that as you go through this journey of waiting to be matched and then being matched, and the baby is with you, you continue to show yourself grace, which you know you are going to have after you bring the baby home. Understand that you are doing something you've never done before, and so is the baby. And very often, I only work overnight as a doula, so I very often get to someone's house at about 9:30 or 10 o'clock at night. And by that time in the day, your parents are exhausted, and the baby is exhausted. And a lot of times these new parents are crying, saying, "You know, the baby's crying, and it's like, "Oh, look, she wants you to do this. And they're like, "Why didn't I know that? Like you have known this baby for four days or two weeks, or you show yourself grace throughout this process, where you are, you're doing something you've never done before, and so is the baby, and so I hope that the information that I've shared has been helpful. Um, you can find me all over the place. You can find me on YouTube, but I am most consistent on Instagram. And I'm always sharing lots of new baby information there. It's not always adoption-specific on Instagram, but you're going to find, you know, as we talked about with bathing and burping and things like that, it doesn't matter how the baby came into your life, but all things baby over on Instagram, and you can find me at New Parents Academy.

Amanda: Awesome. Well, thank you, Valerie, so much. And I will be sure to link to Valerie's Instagram in our show notes and her YouTube channel, as well as to that amazing free training. And I do hope that you'll take the time to go and watch that and get to learn more about Valerie. But thank you so much, Valerie, for joining us today. We really appreciate your time. Thank you so

Valerie: Thank you so much. It's great to be here.

Amanda: Wasn't that amazing? I am so thankful that Valerie was able to join us today. And walk us through the three things that you can be doing right this very second as you prepare and wait for the baby to come home. The other big thing I would highly suggest that you do is head on over and check out Valerie's free workshop. I know you're going to find a lot of value in that. If you enjoyed today's conversation, it's all located in the show notes, or, as we said, you can look below where you're watching or listening to this, or you can click below and find out all of Valerie's information. Remember, my friend, that anything's possible with the right plan and support, and build your village so that you're ready to parent. Let's maybe come, so I'll see you soon, friends!