Adopting A Newborn Baby With An Agency and Self-Matching

Adopting A Newborn Baby (with an agency and self-matching)

If you are working with an adoption agency, you might be missing out on one thing you need to consider: self-matching your adoption. Now, I know that might sound counterintuitive, but this one step could make a difference in the overall speed of your adoption. If you're working with an adoption agency and you've been waiting for longer than a year, my friend, I have a few suggestions on some things you could be doing to make your adoption faster with your adoption agency. Keep reading for tips on how to make this work so that you can match faster.

If you have been waiting with your agency for a while and are not self-matching your adoption, let me be blunt and tell you that you need to do that. My clients that are matching in less than a year are working with their agency, self-matching, and using paid social media ads. 

Your agency partnership can be different; just ask them, but make sure they won’t share other families. Also, don't be scared to self-match! It is easier than you think, let’s look at a few tips on how you can do it that I’m already using with my current clients.

We create your profile together.

When I work with my clients, the very first thing is we dig into their adoption profile. When we dig into their adoption profile, I'm analyzing and reviewing word by word, picture by picture, exactly what is in the profile that their agency is sharing with expectant families. And we all know that every agency has its own little quirks, right of whether or not they're sharing a book, a website, a PDF, or whatever it is. They all have a specific format that they require, so the real key is that you have to find a way to stick out while using that format. The goal is to be memorable, which means you have to find a way to stand out from the crowd. One of the ways that I focus on my clients is by using the adoption profile clarity builder system. We get clear on exactly what you need to do in your adoption profile. 

One of the big things that I see the first time I look at someone's profile, especially folks that don't have a marketing background, is that they share every little detail about their family. When you do that, that makes your profile not clear. Instead, it makes it hard to get to understand who you are and especially hard to remember who you are. So the second thing we do is to ensure they're telling the story. By telling the story, it helps make an emotional connection. We use the emotional connection builder framework to evaluate whether or not they're telling the story that's going to make an emotional connection with an expectant parent. Now, don't come at me at that, that you think that that's slimy, or all of those things, not at all. I'm talking about being clear and articulate about who your family is and what life is like with your family. We're trying to make it so clear that when she looks at your profile, your profile book, whatever it is, she can clearly say yes or no and know if you are the right fit for her family. 

Those are the first two things that I do when somebody comes to me and says that they've been waiting with their adoption agency for over a year, a year and a half, etc., because your profile can have a dramatic impact on the speed of your adoption. 

Adding self-matching to the mix with your agency. 

The second thing that the clients that come to me with are waiting with my agency and need some help. That’s when I suggest that we dig in together and talk about adding self-matching to the mix. Now, I know you probably think that is way counterintuitive. What in the world are you talking about? You're putting yourself in the driver's seat when self-matching your adoption. You are focused on making sure that your profile is amazing. Then you have a clear plan on how to share that you can do self-matching or use self-matching with your agency as your partner to finalize. 

Let’s talk about how my clients are finding success this way. You will have an exact roadmap to follow in that conversation. The first thing I always encourage them to do is to reach out to their agency and ask them that if they were to find an expectant parent to match with on their own, would the agency be willing to support that expectant family and finalize that adoption for them on their behalf. If their agency says yes, we get super clear and down to work on where they will share their profile. We create different profile elements than what their agency uses to help them stand out and be a bit more isolated so that they can ensure that expectant families are only looking at their profile. 

To be more specific, I help them create social media content, sometimes social media as a website. You see expected families matching on their own, typically finding through someone through social media that either come across them in a Facebook group. Then they click on that profile posted in that Facebook group and go back and look at that page. If they like what they see and they want to go on over to a website to learn more about you. On the Facebook page, they're mainly just looking at pictures and getting a general sense of who you are; they expect the website to be organized to make it easier for them to understand who you are. 

If they don't find you in a Facebook group and you're matching with them digitally, they find you through a Facebook ad that we've likely built together. Then, you pay Facebook and Instagram to show that ad to people considering placing their child for adoption. Now, that sounds super easy, but let me fully admit it's not. It takes a lot of work on our part together to do that. But it is possible, and clients do it all the time. 

Of course, we cannot overlook the third way people match or self-match their adoption, which is in person. They might see a flyer, or they might receive a business card, and it's typically going to have a QR code that will drive somebody back to a website so that they can go back and learn a little bit more about you. Then once they know more about you and feel comfortable with you, they will reach out to you to talk to you. And when they reach out to talk to you, you may be a little panicked about what to say and do. Don't worry; my one-on-one clients get a step-by-step guide to help them through those initial conversations. You want to begin to form a relationship together, and when you're forming that relationship together, once you feel confident that you know this is the right fit for me, then you're going to direct them to your agency. Your agency's going to go through kind of a typical onboarding process with them to ensure that you're the right fit together, and they're going to do things like asking for medical records, asking for medical histories, ensuring that they understand what level of support this expansive family needs and that they can provide that support. Then you're going to have a ‘typical’ agency adoption from there, which means you'll wait for the baby to be born; your agency will support them throughout that process, potentially with social workers and counselors for both you and them as needed. And then you're going to finalize your adoption legally. 

It may sound counterintuitive to suggest adding self-matching to your adoption when you're matching with an agency. But the real difference is that you're putting yourself in the driver's seat. You're taking a profile that we build together, and you're taking a marketing plan that I write for you that tells you what to do on what days and what groups and the best times to do things. So if you've been waiting for a year or even longer, or you can do it just from out the gate, if you want to get started self-matching your adoption while you match your adoption, you will be matching in less than a year. 

If you have any questions about how all of that works, feel free to contact me in my adoption coach group. I hope this blog has been super valuable and gives you the confidence to manage your adoption in less than a year by following a proven roadmap that others are seeing success with. Remember, anything's possible with the right plan and support, and I'm here and have your back every step of the way.

Hi, I Am Amanda

I am an adoption profile expert on a mission to help you create and share your family's story more affordably!