Adopting Donor Embryos FAQ
Choosing the right method of adoption to form your family can be a very difficult task, but as with anything in life having a clear vision of your destination can make the journey much easier. Also, having an experienced guide to give you the road map can make the journey easier too. In this article I am sharing the most frequently asked questions about private adoption that I have received over the years.
Before diving right into Embryo Adoption Frequently Asked Questions let’s review the total landscape of options to adopt a child. All of which have been covered on this blog in both a deep dive and a frequently asked questions format in other posts for your reference.
There are 7 Ways to Adopt a Child:
Embryo Adoption
Adopting an Infant Internationally
Adopting an Infant Through Foster Care
Adopting an Infant with a Private Agency
Adopting an Infant with a Private Attorney
Adopting an Older Child Internationally
Adopting an Older Child from Foster Care
Commonly Asked Questions About Adopting an Embryo or Embryo Recipiency
What is Embryo Adoption: Embryo Adoption allows a biological family that has completed forming their family to choose an adoptive family to give their embryos to which is technically an adoption.
What is Embryo Donation: the language between donation and adoption is chosen specifically depending on the states involved, donation is something that is not regulated at the federal level but more at the state level. Some states will call it embryo adoption while others will call it embryo donation.
What is Embryo Recipiency: Is the act of receiving the embryos themselves, just another term for the same process to add to the complexity level of adoption.
What is a Snowflake Adoption: frozen embryos are sometimes called snowflakes, since the majority of embryos available for adoption are frozen technically all embryo adoptions are snowflake adoptions.
What type of contact is required after placement: this highly depends on the agency and their contact requirements as well as your own preferences and the birth family preferences. Again, this is something you are clear with in your vision casting exercise upfront and pick an agency that will help you achieve this in your final placement opportunity.
What is open adoption: you have regularly agreed upon contact and/or visits after finalization. There is typically a guideline that is established by the agency and you work to reach an agreement with the birth mother. Some common industry practices are one time before the age of 5 and twice between the ages of 5-18.
What is semi open adoption: contact through the agency or some other third party agency is typically referred to as semi open adoption. This could come in the form of letter exchange, contact via social media, or simple updates to the agency that they pass along for you to the birth family.
What is closed adoption: the simplest way to think about this no contact of any sort, even through the agency. A truly closed adoption is very rare these days but more common in embryo adoption than other forms of adoption.
What if we find each other through social media: social media has truly added a whole new dimension to the adoption process as it has reduced one's capability to remain 100% anonymous in this process. Interacting with respect in all areas of communication is key to a successful adoption situation and social media is no different. Ensuring you are living up to the agreed upon methods of communication is the best way to honor the agreement you made during the matching process.
How do you pick a type of contact: this comes back to the vision exercise you wrote at the start of this journey. It is also important to imagine in detail what the conversation will be like with your child when they ask questions (or if they do) and ensure you are picking a path that will enable the type of conversation you will feel most comfortable with when/if that day comes.
Cost to Adopt an Embryo: this can run from $5K to $20K depending on the situation, using donor embryos from an IVF clinic is typically $5-10K while an agency is typically $10-20K.
Do we have to use a surrogate in Embryo Adoption: no, you should choose the best method to carry the child, and it does not need to include a surrogate unless your doctor does not believe you will be able to carry a child to term.
Timeline to Adopt an Embryo: this varies dramatically based on the agency and how restrictive you are on certain medical issues. Agencies will typically tell you 6 months to 1 year, while fertility clinics will depend on how many frozen embryos that they have at any one time.
How to pick an agency: picking an agency is a very important step in the process as they will be your partner in this super crazy journey ahead. It is important to know their communication style, their preferred work style, their process, and their fees. I also believe you need to gel well together because you are going to have a long emotional road ahead and you need to feel comfortable with them as your partner in what is to come.
What information can I find out about the embryos: this will vary but generally you will be told what grade and quality the embryos are, if any pregnancies resulted from this same “batch” of embryos, if those pregnancies resulted in live healthy births, and if there was any genetic testing done on these embryos you will be allowed to know those results.
Can further genetic testing be done on these embryos: no, since the embryos are frozen you cannot genetically test them further because that would require thawing and once they are thawed they must be transferred.
What is PGS testing: Preimplantation genetic screening: or PGS, is also known as comprehensive chromosome screening, or CCS. This process involves taking cells from a blastocyst embryo and performing genetic analysis.
What happens to the embryos during PGS testing: during PGS a slice of the DNA of the embryo is taken out, without harming the embryo, and tested by the lab to determine the number of chromosomes present in that embryo.
What happens to the embryos after PGS testing: freezing the embryos while waiting on the test results is the most common practice but you could also do a “fresh” transfer as well.
Why do PGS testing: Ensuring that the embryo has the correct number of chromosomes allows you to have a greater success rate in achieving a pregnancy but it does not guarantee a live birth or a healthy child.
Can I adopt embryos from another state: yes, you can adopt embryos from another state and that is the most common situation. Unlike traditional adoption agencies embryo adoption agencies have the ability to work in most if not all states.
What is ICPC and Does it Apply to Embryos: Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children (ICPC) is basically an agreement between the states to take responsibility for your adhering to the birth states guidelines for adopting the child. The home state of the child must accept responsibility before you can go home. Luckily this is not something that applies for embryo adoption or embryo recipiency.
What medical decisions will I be allowed to make and when: unlike traditional adoptions you are allowed to make 100% of the medical decisions the moment the embryos are legally yours.
Pros/Cons of Adopting an Embryo: the benefits are that you are carrying the child, you have little risk in the biological family changing their mind and the overall process with the agency is much more simple than other forms of adoption. The biggest barrier in this form of adoption typically is the ability of the adoptive mother to have a successful pregnancy outcome. The risks with this type of adoption are much more in the camp of getting pregnant and staying pregnant.
Risk Sharing: Typically there is no risk sharing for this type of choice since the odds come down to the individual fertility clinics success rates for frozen embryo transfer and are highly dependent on your individual medical factors.
Embryo Adoption tends to be one of the more budget friendly options within the world of adoption if you are able to carry a pregnancy yourself. Typically the costs entail: agency fees for background checks, matching with a birth family, screenings to ensure a high success rate for transfer, storage fees for the embryos, costs to transfer the embryos from storage to the clinic, then the typical costs of a frozen IVF transfer from your fertility clinic. Typical range of costs for embryo adoption is $5-10K plus the cost of the frozen transfer, so total $5-20K. This can often times make embryo adoption cheaper than IVF itself since you are avoiding one leg of the IVF process all together.
To recap there are 7 Ways to Adopt A Child to choose from and in this article we focused on Embryo adoption:
Embryo Adoption
Adopting an Infant Internationally
Adopting an Infant Through Foster Care
Adopting an Infant with a Private Agency
Adopting an Infant with a Private Attorney
Adopting an Older Child Internationally
Adopting an Older Child from Foster Care
Now that you are more familiar with how to adopt donor frozen embryos the next step is to review the other 6 options and pick a path that matches your vision for your life. And if you haven’t done my vision casting exercise make sure to head back to sign up to receive the Steps to Adoption free download to work through the vision casting exercise.
I know that picking a path from these options can be confusing and overwhelming but it doesn’t have to be. Let’s work together through your adoption process. You need someone that will be in your corner each step of the way. If you are interested in learning more, you can schedule a free call at the link below. We can put together your specific step by step journey through your adoption process, so you can reach your goal of motherhood.
Remember you can do this and I have your back, because after all, anything is achievable with a plan and support.
Hi, I Am Amanda
I help women build their families through adoption by giving them the step by step guide to adopt a child and support them on their journey
